Collaborative Divorce

Collaborative Divorce For You And Your Family

If it is time to end your relationship, remember that the way you divorce is the first step to a good post-divorce life. I can go through options with you and help you decide which is best for you. I am a huge fan of Collaborative Divorce.

Collaborative Divorce is the Least Combative, Most Supportive Way to Divorce

Divorce is an emotionally complex process. Most people going through divorce will tell you that it is the most emotionally challenging experience they have ever had.

Your marriage started in love, perhaps even a spiritual union.

You can divorce in a way that continues to honor who and what you’ve been. When you separate your lives from this place of honoring each other you keep conflicts at a minimum protecting your assets and your family going forward.

Don’t leave it to a judge to decide what is best for your family.

Collaborative Divorce is a team approach that supports and guides your decisions about family, finances, and your future without the need for court, allowing you to keep your decisions in-house.

Divorce is a legal, financial and emotional process (not necessarily in that order). The Collaborative team is made up of two collaboratively trained attorneys (one for you and one for your spouse), a collaboratively trained coach, and a collaboratively trained neutral financial expert, to support the legal, financial and emotional aspects of your divorce.

The Collaborative Divorce Team:

Your attorney will advise you on your legal decisions: Should you keep your home, buy your partner out, or sell it? How will you determine market value? Do you need a business evaluation? How will maintenance (formerly known as alimony) and child support work? And many other things.

My role in the Collaborative process is a Collaborative Divorce Facilitator (CDF). I am a neutral presence in the room, guiding the process, maintaining the emotional equilibrium, supporting communication, calming conflict, holding space for your future goals, helping with parenting related needs.

  • The financial professional (FP) will meet with both of you individually to learn about your overall financial picture. As things progress, the FP will suggest options and run the numbers to show you possible results of different scenarios you are considering so you are fully informed before making important decisions: How can you best divide your assets with the least financial impact? What are the tax consequences in each scenario? Which investment will incur a penalty if you withdraw or close the account? How will bonuses and other future payouts affect your agreement? And more.

I have worked with Jeannine on several collaborative cases. Jeannine is very good at initially assessing clients for their ability to work in a collaborative manner, and in determining the relational and personal dynamics they bring. Jeannine works with clients at the table and in private sessions helping them stay focused on their stated goals and providing support for the emotional experience that is divorce. She also helps clients develop their parenting plan. ~ Bert Dempsey, Collaborative Divorce Attorney ~ Boulder, Colorado

My Role

As CDF I want to know about your family’s needs, the traditions that are important to your family, the parenting schedule you’ve developed so far and how it is working for you, and what your daily schedules are like. I will check in with how your children are doing and provide both support and education on ways to reduce the impact of divorce on your children, including how to tell them of your divorce if that is needed.

As CDF I maintain the emotional equilibrium of all involved. Emotions and overwhelm can show up quickly and we don’t want those to hijack your progress. You and I will design a plan to utilize your strengths and manage your weaknesses through the process. I will support both of you in the areas your marriage has failed you. If your communication is weak, I will be the bridge between you. If trust is gone, I will support your conversations and reframe your words in a positive way to keep triggering down.

There are many ways I support the hurts and holes you arrive with. I am not a therapist and my role is not therapeutic. I am a relationship systems coach working with the dynamics in your relationship so you can stay on track. It is not unusual for old relational patterns to sneak into today’s negotiations. We will work around those.

Sometimes these dynamics are best handled in a simple 3-way meeting with the two of you and me separate from the team. This saves you legal fees.

If Collaborative Divorce is not your interest, I can support you in all these ways outside of the Collaborative Divorce process, too.

My Role

  • My Role 1
  • My Role 2
  • My Role 3

As CDF I want to know about your family’s needs, the traditions that are important to your family, the parenting schedule you’ve developed so far and how it is working for you, and what your daily schedules are like. I will check in with how your children are doing and provide both support and education on ways to reduce the impact of divorce on your children, including how to tell them of your divorce if that is needed.

As CDF I want to know about your family’s needs, the traditions that are important to your family, the parenting schedule you’ve developed so far and how it is working for you, and what your daily schedules are like. I will check in with how your children are doing and provide both support and education on ways to reduce the impact of divorce on your children, including how to tell them of your divorce if that is needed.

As CDF I want to know about your family’s needs, the traditions that are important to your family, the parenting schedule you’ve developed so far and how it is working for you, and what your daily schedules are like. I will check in with how your children are doing and provide both support and education on ways to reduce the impact of divorce on your children, including how to tell them of your divorce if that is needed.

Your Next Step:

Call me to learn more about the Collaborative Divorce process or my services as a divorce coach. You can use this link to get on my calendar. I’m glad to answer your questions and also speak with your spouse so you both understand the benefits of Collaborative Divorce.

Divorce is tricky. Nobody divorcing for the first, or even second, time is (or should be) an expert. Professional  help is invaluable.